Last week, I took the kids to see a very old friend of mine and her children. Both sets of kids had been suffering from the general cough, colds and unexplained temperatures so had barely been out that week. With Five kids under six year’s old running around the house for three hours we decided mid afternoon to let them out into the garden. As ‘M’ and I sat in deckchairs watching them running around I noticed some brightly covered painted pots lined up along the patio.
‘What’s that?’ I enquired
‘That’s our Pesach sunflowers’ M responded. ‘Each year on Pesach, we buy some pots, paint them and plant sun flowers in them. Last year when my in-laws were here from Israel, they did theirs too. It’s become kind of tradition’
‘That’s amazing’ I replied
‘Not really’ she said, ‘it’s just something we do. It marks the beginning of Pesach and the beginning of spring’
I think that it is a truly lovely tradition. ‘M’ pointed to last year’s pots, neatly stacked by the side of the patio and looking at them I realised that it was a fabulous way to look at how the children have changed and developed in the previous year. It is also a great way to get your children excited about a festival or yearly event. Of course we have Seder at Pesach, Light the Chanukiah on Chanukah and eat cheesecake on Shavuot but do we do anything that is particularly associated with our family? Not really.
As Jews we are told from a very young age that tradition is important. Preserve your Judaism, Don’t assimilate and retain your Jewish identity our Jewish educators tells us. However, even the greatest of traditions started off as something revolutionary. In a few weeks time it is Purim and it is our obligation to listen to the Megillah. However, it is also tradition to boo the name of Haman. When Haman's name is read out during the public chanting of the Megillah in synagogue, the community engages in noisemaking to blot out his name. The practice can be traced back to the leading French and German rabbis of the 13th century in accordance with a passage in the Midrash, where the verse "Thou shalt blot out the remembrance of Amalek" (Deut 25:19) A custom developed of writing the name of Haman, (a descendent of the Amalekites), on two smooth stones, and knocking them together until the name was blotted out. Some wrote the name of Haman on the soles of their shoes, and at the mention of the name stamped with their feet as a sign of contempt. This custom was revolutionary at the time as it was thought to disturb the decorum of the synagogue but as years have gone by it has now become tradition.
While to ‘M’ her tradition was quite trivial, it was also a great way of marking a change of season, the beginning of a festival and that the family is together for it. It doesn’t matter that there was no religious link between the sunflowers and Pesach (apart from our dependency on sunflower oil for that week!) but it does mean that M’s children will forever associate Spring with Pesach with family and being Jewish, which is something as Jewish parents we are obliged to do.
My family don’t have any particular tradition at the moment. Sometimes just making sure we are altogether on a Friday night is hard enough but it has reemphasised to me the importance of creating traditions for you and your family that will engage you as a family in Jewish life
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